& you're the one for me ;

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Less than a fortnight to go before the "feared" OP exam.
Preparations so far have not been that significant.
Perhaps some people just don't realise the importance of project work on our future.

Feeling frustrated over my inability to control myself during presentations.
The look of nervousness is still obvious, said my supervising tutor.
And the Q&A section remains one major stumbling block.

There isn't much that can be done about this, though.
I am a Follower. Doesn't enjoy being in the spotlight.
Would rather let somebody else lead the way.

Having to present something in front of a large audience just isn't my niche area.
Stumbling and stuttering will be a certainty for me, even on the actual day.
For my group, we are slotted to present on 13 Nov.
Which means an additional weekend to improve slides and rehearse.
But seriously speaking, no matter how many times we rehearse, it won't be easy to remove this psychological barrier.

The list of excuses can continue further.
But I won't waste time harping on such meaningless stuffs.
I shall try to overcome all my in-built weaknesses and impress the examiners.
Just for once.

And you think presentations will be a thing of the past after this exam?
That's naive thinking on your part.
No matter how much I detest presentations, they will still come in droves next year.
It's unavoidable.
Learning to face problems should be the way to do things.

If I don't brush up my interpersonal skills right this instant, this is what might happen to me 20 years down the road.

"Single, taking care of parents."
"Taking on low-pay, low value-adding jobs with salary below $1000 monthly."
"Very few friends in the workplace and beyond."

There're many instances when I ask myself: is this the future of Chris Chan?
Once a youthful and promising person, now a no-lifer?
Certainly not.
Maybe I could try to be involved in the gaming industry.
Maybe even resort management.
Many possibilities, but sadly, only one can be accomplished.

It's time to wake up to reality.
Learn something useful.
Start gathering work experience.

I was further motivated when a promoter of some brand of ice cream came to our doorstep two days ago.
This promoter looked one or two years younger than me.
And apparently, she had reported to work right after attending school.
Cos' she was wearing school uniform of Hougang Sec.

Such cases are indeed a reality check, that idling around at home doesn't get you anywhere.
Other people my age are actively seeking part-time jobs this vacation.
NS is looming after my A levels next year.
This is probably the one and only chance to have some hands-on experience outside my comfort zone.

Therefore, I shall not be left behind.
Productivity doesn't fall from the sky.
It comes only with lots of effort put in to adapt to new skills.

those memories. 11:19